The difficulties I experienced recently with my condo caused me to wonder if I have some fatal character flaw that made it impossible for me to find good tenants to rent my place. I don’t know the answer to that, but for reasons I can’t fathom, I have not had much luck dealing with certain categories of people, tenants among them. On the other hand, the vast majority of people I’ve interacted with, by choice or by necessity, have been simply wonderful, and I am grateful that they came into my life.
The Good
Landlords: There has not been a bad one among them. I salute them all: Joe and Lilly Gudmundsen, Henry Escalante, Lewis Macaulay, Richard Merrill, and Sharon Whitcomb. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you’ve done to provide me with safe, well-maintained, comfortable homes.
Bosses: With two exceptions, one a man and the other a woman, they have all been fantastic. The man was a prick; there’s no other word that better describes him. The woman was sweet, generous, and personable, but lazy and clueless. I have nothing but praise for the others: Stan Hart, Bob Rindler, Nancy Fitzpatrick, Al Lefebvre, and Paul Gerhard.
Colleagues: With one notorious exception, not a clunker among them. You guys are the best. You know who you are!
Roommates: When I first moved to Tempe, Arizona, I shared a two-bedroom apartment with a woman who turned out to be whacked. She eventually threw me out, and it was actually a relief to be out on the street. After that horrible experience, I lived happily with only felines for companionship, except for when I traveled and shared accommodations. I guess it wasn’t me, because I loved my roommates: Pam McPhail, Barbara Payson, Kairos Marquardt, Susan Potavin, and Jan Golding. Bless you all.
The Generally Good
Services: In contrast to what I’ve heard from a lot of my friends and relatives, I have had generally positive interactions with banks and insurance companies, with utilities, with retail establishments like stores, restaurants, dry cleaners, and auto mechanics, and with the airlines and other forms of public transportation. Maybe it’s because I tended to pay my bills on time? And in the case of travel, perhaps my expectations are more realistic. For example, when you want to schlep hundreds of people and tons of baggage over 5000 miles and across a couple of frontal systems, perhaps you should expect some glitches along the way.
One exception that comes immediately to mind is AmericaOnline. I was a subscriber for many years, but when I decided to cancel my service a few years back, I ran into the brick wall of rude and obstinate customer service representatives who insisted that I really must want to remain an AOL subscriber. I did not, and I wanted a refund for my prepaid months. If I had taped my conversations and posted them to YouTube, I’d have had my 15-minutes of fame for sure.
The Bad
Tenants: I’ve been a landlord now for over 15 years, and the less said about the succession of people, six in all, who rented my condo, the better. I don’t think any of them, except maybe Fusako, really cared about whether the place was clean or not. Now, I myself hate cleaning, but I also have some inkling of what’s acceptable and what’s not. But my tenants? Not likely.
Doctors: I’ve been in the workforce for over 26 years, full-time, with no breaks in employment, so you know I’ve had group health care benefits for a long time. Well, I have not liked ANY of my doctors, no matter who they were or where they practiced; I found them to be cold and arrogant, uninterested in or incapable of dialog, and not even necessarily competent in diagnosis. In fact, even now I am so loath to walk into a clinic that I don’t have a primary care physician and haven’t been seen at a clinic in almost five years. The one shining exception was Dr. Susan Foley, of Sterling; she was my therapist for about a year, and I loved her. When I think of the other physicians, I guess I objected most of all to their attitude. They treated me like I was a sick and weak person who didn’t know anything about health or medicine, but Dr. Foley treated me like a “well person”; she saw her job as helping me become stronger and healthier.
Other Medical Service Providers: Under this category I’m including dentists, ophthalmologists, and veterinarians. I’ve had better luck with dentists, though nothing to write home about. My more satisfactory encounters have been with the eye doctors–I’ve generally liked the people who wrote me prescriptions for glasses or contacts. My cats’ vets have been skilled and compassionate, but their practices were always so busy, and I hated waiting for what seemed like hours in rooms filled with other anxious and whining companion animals.
The Ugly
Folks, one word: Boyfriends. Again it’s probably a character flaw, but I’ve not had a lot of luck on the dating scene. Why are people so unreasonable? Why is it so hard to practice civility, courtesy and consideration? The guys I’ve been involved with lacked these qualities in spades.
Listen to this conversation:
Me: You know, if you want to do something with me, like have dinner or see a movie, could you possibly ask me at least 24 hours in advance? I’m not too keen on dropping whatever I’m doing because you’ve decided you’re bored and I happen to be the first one available as you’re going down your list.
Him: Okay. [Thinks a bit] So, does this mean that if I want to meet you for dinner at 6 pm tomorrow night, I can’t call you at 7 pm tonight?
Me: If you’re going to count minutes, just forget it. You don’t get it, do you? What I’m saying is, If spending time with me isn’t important enough for you to think about it a day in advance and commit to, don’t even bother.
Here’s another (with a different person):
Setting: I’m at home on a Thursday evening and the phone rings.
Me: Hello.
Him: Hi. Can I come over?
Me: Sorry, not right now. I’m watching “Friends.”
Him: So, watching a rerun of a TV sitcom has priority over seeing me?
Me: You’ve told me many times that I’m last on your list of priorities. Well, guess what? That makes you last on mine.
Him: Yeah, okay. I see your point. Catch you later then.
Yes, truly the ugly.