When I first started applying to colleges I’d originally declared myself as a music major. But half way through the applications I stopped; something just didn’t feel right about it. As passionate as I was about singing and dancing, I felt that maybe I should embark on a path that was a bit more academically oriented. In my heart I knew that I would always be able to pursue my love for the performing arts on the side no matter what. And so, I dove into my freshman year head first as a declared Spanish Major. However, my perception of what that meant then and what it means now has transformed dramatically.

At 18 years old I was fresh out of high school. Quite frankly, I didn’t even want to be at UMASS to begin with, so needless to say I was somewhat of a miserable person. When people asked me ‘Why Spanish?’ I would say “because it’s the only other thing I’m good at.” I was more than bitter about not pursuing my musical aspirations and felt that I’d made a huge mistake. I even spent a great deal of time after first semester sophomore year considering switching my major over to vocal performance. I hit a wall that I never imagined I’d hit; I didn’t want anything to do with Spanish anymore. I found myself taking other classes that weren’t even requirements just so I could be intrigued by a new topic. Every single class was Spanish Spanish Spanish and I had become indifferent and felt that I had lost my once passionate spark.

But with some convincing from my good friend, I decided it would be a waste of so many years to give up now, and I pressed on. It was the best decision I could’ve made because that following semester I took one of the most memorable classes of my college career: U.S. Latino Literature and Culture with Alberto Ameal-Perez. To this day, he is still my favorite professor of all time, the man is hilarious. He has this air about him that makes you feel like every time he walks into the class room he just got back from Argentina, as if there were some glorious apparition of Buenos Aires right outside the doorway that he walked out of. Colorful and big-hearted, he inspired my interest in the Hispanic / Latino establishment in the U.S. The class really set me on a track that allowed me to explore Spanish culture in a way that I never had before. Learning about the birth of Spanish Harlems, immigration, Spanish artists, producers and writers who made a name for themselves in America, what code-switching was, who used it and why. I walked away from that course with newfound feelings and opinions, but most importantly, with more questions. I’ve found that sometimes it is the courses that don’t fill your head with answers, but rather with questions, that teach you the most.

Another course that I can deem as the most memorable and influential was my Education 202: Social Issues in Intergroup Relations. The primary focus of the course was understanding race and learning new methods of dialogue and communication. I learned so much, not just about foreign identity, but my own identity as well. For the first time in my life I was studying the meaning of being a white person. What does it mean when I check the box next to White on a professional document? How am I viewed by people of other races? We explored racism on an entirely new level and talked about what it meant to be African American, Asian or Latin American, not just in the U.S. but on a college campus. I felt like after this class wheels in my head were spinning on overdrive and I now had newfound opinions and ideas that were relatable to the major. I think it was the first time I recognized myself as more than just a Spanish major but as an intermediary, as a voice for those who cannot speak English. What was considered to be a ‘white ally.’ There was a role I was filling without even being aware of it, and now that it had been realized, I wanted to fulfill it wholeheartedly.

Once I had established a clearer understanding of my ability, as well as my desire to fulfill this position as a voice of communication, I basically sprinted into my 3rd most memorable class; Interpreter Studies with Moira Inghilleri. The content of the readings as well as in class simulations of interpreting situations opened new doors for me. I could now possibly consider myself an interlocutor, or ‘man in the middle’ in the world of interpreters. Never before had I felt more compelled to perfect my Spanish, and I’d certainly never felt such pride in being a Spanish major. That pride only grew when I studied abroad in Spain Spring of 2013. I was part of a new world, and I was welcomed into it and I lived and breathed in every possible aspect because I could speak Spanish.

When I was studying in Granada I actually participated in volunteer work twice a week at a Monestario, helping kids with their homework. The students were much younger, ranging in age from 6-16 years old, but I found that I was usually always helping them with their English homework. You’d think this would be easy but I’ll tell you, explaining the reason for ‘She has’ and ‘We have’ is one of the more challenging battles I’ve fought. Especiallly when the little boy named Ishmael is more interested in licking his candy and sticking it to your arm or dipping it in a hidden stash of sugar that’s been sitting on the bookshelf. (I digress)

BUT helping these children was an eye opener as to just how important it was for me to be able to communicate with them in their native tongue, and how important this type of interaction is for speakers of all languages. More so, simply being in a Spanish speaking country, I realized that being fluent in Spanish wasn’t just a fun time to practice speaking. It was a way of survival; that’s how you get around, that’s how you get answers to questions, that’s how you catch a cab, that’s how you find the party, that’s how you find the best tapas bars, that’s how you experience the culture first hand. It was a life changing experience for me, and I remember coming back to the states not even thinking I was a Spanish major but convinced that I was Spanish haha.

I would have to say that while my perception of the major has changed over the past 4 years, I’d prefer much more to say that it has grown. I’m not the 18 year old girl who resented her school and only believed she was good at 3 things in the world. Now I am 22 and I have developed a love and appreciation deeper than any for the language, culture, and communities of the Spanish speaking world. I have reached the peak and there are certain areas of the major that I am more interested in than others which before I wasn’t able to determine. I feel like I have some sort of purpose. I believe in myself as more than just a student of language, but as an intermediary for the Spanish speaking community and as a person with an advantage over the monolingual percentage who are unable to embrace the gift that I have been so lucky to experience.