I have always had a deep appreciation for words and the way that they can be strung together to form sentences that make your heart beat a little faster. I learned at a young age how powerful words can be and how much they can make you feel. I constantly find myself sitting back in awe and thinking about the words that I have just read, the goosebumps that they have produced, furiously underlining them or scribbling them into my notebook. When my professor introduced me to the works of Sarah Kay sophomore year, I instantly felt a connection. Kay’s collection of poems, “No Matter the Wreckage” has that effect on me word after word, poem after poem. What she says throughout her poems always hits me hard, no matter how many times I reread them.

      Prior to reading her poems I had never really cared for poetry in general. The messages always seemed to evade me and many of the lines were stuffed with words that were outdated and unnecessarily verbose. I found my eyes glossing over every poem my teachers had made me read, too impatient to even begin to decipher the meanings. They did not intrigue me or inspire me. But when I opened Kay’s collection of poems my eyes did not glaze over; instead I could feel my arms tingling and my heart racing. There were so many lines that I found myself reading over and over, letting them hit me harder and harder each time. Her work was refreshingly modern. I did not have to sparknote the meaning or read the poem several times, only to be frustrated by the fact that I had no idea what the poet was trying to say. There was an easiness to so many of the poems, an approachability and a casual, yet powerful tone that I could only ever dream of emulating.

      Since coming to college I have found myself craving a literary presence from strong women who are unapologetically feminist and powerful with their words. When I first read Kay’s poem “Dragons” it hit me hard. I remember even putting a sticky note on the page with five exclamation points on it. It was a retelling of everything I had started piecing together about society. It was everything that I had observed about the way that people were treating me, my sisters and my female friends. It reminded me of every sexist customer, co worker, stranger, or family member that I had ever had to deal with and it sparked a fire within me.

      The first line, “My father and brother were born with cannonball fists. Avalanche tongues,” drew me in immediately. But her lines, “Place your hands on me one more time, then again, exhale the cigarette into my eyes, tell me again how I’m just not understanding the point, remind me how you are an expert, touch my knee, my thigh, my lower back, ignore me twice, three times…” sent my heart racing and my brain catapulting into literary bliss. There is a calm power within those lines that causes a jolting into my veins, goosebumps on my arms and a subdued, but tangible anger in my heart.

      Before reading this poem I had been in a bit of a rut. The weekly grind of churning out paper after paper and reading hundreds of pages a night of texts that I did not even like was wearing thin on me. I was starting to question why I even wanted to be an english major to begin with. Hardly any of my classes were inspiring me in any way; all the reading and writing just felt like busy work. Every time I went to class and we talked about the texts I felt like I was missing something, like my brain wasn’t analyzing literature the way that it used to. I lacked enthusiasm and passion. College was running me down and making me lose sight of something that I had always loved. I never had time to read for fun anymore or discover new novels that were not on the syllabus. But reading the poem and the rest of Kay’s works woke me up. It made me realize why I had decided to become an english major in the first place. It made me value words the way that I used to.

      As a result, when I found myself enrolled in a creative writing poetry class, I remembered how I had felt reading Kay’s poems. It had taken me so long to be interested in poetry so I could not even imagine myself actually writing a poem. But instead of dropping the class I resolved to do something that was out of comfort zone and stay in it. Since her work had made me take a second look at a genre that I had been neglecting because of a handful of bad experiences, I put this new intrigue to work and forced myself to write in a way that I had not before. I took a deep breathe and channeled my inner Sarah Kay and wrote a couple of poems and shared them with the class; a pretty nerve wracking experience. The class taught me a lot about the value of poets. It made me understand just how hard it is. It made me appreciate the words that went into them even more and I never would have gained that experience if it were not for the encouragement of Kay’s works.

      The powerful feminist voice within “Dragons” triggered an entirely different level of appreciation for Kay in me. While my love of english was being questioned, my knowledge and appreciation of feminist politics was just starting to grow. The poem solidified this notion that women could be powerful in their own way. That they did not have to fit into a role of aggression and violence in order to be considered authoritative. It brought things full circle for me and showed me how I could really use my love of words for more than just scribbling in journals or writing papers for my professors. This placed things into perspective for me and made me value my english major in a way that had been slipping away from me. It helped me recognize the power of literature and the power of words once again, solidifying my decision to become an english major in the first place.

      As an english major I am always looking for new texts and authors that light a fire underneath me, that make me want to be a better reader and writer. For me, Kay is one of those authors. Her voice is calm, but compelling. Her words are calculated and her punctuation is precise, making each poem flow perfectly. The message that “Dragons” sends is one of feminine solidarity as well as literary inspiration. It reminds me of the power that I have within me and urges me to convey that each and everyday. Ultimately, as a strong woman and a strong writer, Sarah Kay means a lot to me. Her works encouraged me to keep going when I felt lost and allowed me to step out of my comfort zone and allow myself to take on new experiences.